Humility and Confidence Go Hand In Hand


Welcome! Today I’m feeling really great. Over the last few days I’ve been feeling angry at some events, attitudes, and outcomes. Its been such a great blessing to be listening to some very grounding books to help me focus on what this means for me. I’m feeling very blessed to know that my feelings are for me, and to use them to guide my beliefs, thoughts, attitudes, and actions.

So today I was feeling very good because I realized that my conflict was born out of an expectation that other people would do what I knew to be right. However, today I had a new thought that has totally shifted my energy.

I was starting to feel angry when this conversation happened between Angry Dave (AD) and Higher-Self Dave (HSD).

HSD: Why are you angry?
AD: Because they aren’t doing what I think they should.
HSD: That is their choice. Why do you want to control them?
AD: Their choice is a bad one.
HSD: So you know that they have made a mistake?
AD: Yes.
HSD: Can you know that absolutely?
AD: No. For me, their decision is a mistake, but they may have other reasons I don’t understand.
HSD: So are you mad at them for not asking you, or for making their decision?
AD: I’m mad that they didn’t ask me.
HSD: They may not understand how much you know. You know that I know how much you know.
AD: You do?
HSD: Yes, I do. And I see that your knowing is revealed by the decisions you see in others. Perhaps you are angry because you don’t know that I know how much you know?
AD: perhaps.
HSD: My knowing of you is revealed by events just like this. You see, I can see your knowledge by comparing a decision that you would make to the decision of another. I hope that you can feel validated by the comparison instead of feeling lesser from it.
AD: HOLY COW! YOU’RE RIGHT! I do not need judge others negatively, I can just realize my knowing and let go of outcomes beyond my control. I can be happy in knowing myself.

Of course this is slightly edited to avoid discussing the particulars of the situation, but I think it captures the process for me. This conversation took about five minutes, and then continued to evolve into this final understanding throughout the day. The resulting conclusion is that I can experience a strengthened sense of self without the degradation of others. I cannot know what problems others face, nor what their truth is, yet I can feel good about what I know and when it is different from others I have confidence in my abilities without tearing others down.

I am feeling so blessed to know that I can let go of the judgement of others and instead find joy in being me. A me that is really, really smart. 🙂

God bless you. I love you.

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10 thoughts on “Humility and Confidence Go Hand In Hand

    1. As Byron Katie would say, Desire for something different is in conflict with what is. I believe this is of course the root cause of my anger. I needed to accept what is as “the right of it.” So in this way my thinking was taking me away from my desire.
      .
      Regarding if I was wrong in my judgement of the decision. I have to keep the details confidential.

      1. Thank you for the clarifications. I re-read your comment and got a new understanding.

        The process i was using in the conversation with myself was what Byron Katie talks about in her work.

        I personally like admitting that I am not all knowing and still allowing myself to be confident in my knowing. There is something healing to me about being humble and still having confidence.

      2. Thanks for rereading it. I really like your last paragraph here. Being humble and still having confidence is a great combination!

  1. You have such high-level conversations with your HS. Mine are awfully mundane by comparison; sometimes I can hardly spot the difference. Maybe I just talk to myself. Do you? I don’t know . . . Make your mind up! Why? Not here you idiot, this is a public place. Oh yes. Dave will think you’re mad. I’ll blame it on you. He won’t know the difference! Oh shit . . . 😳

  2. Absolutely Dave. I found that as I became freer psychologically, from say, middle age (I’m now well past it 😳 ), that I talked to myself increasingly. Usually it’s ‘interior’ stuff, but sometimes I’ll verbalise it outwardly. I can go a whole day without seeing anyone and yet I might utter outwardly a couple of random words – and I seldom know why I chose those particular ones. I usually laugh when it happens. I can’t claim it’s any ‘higher self’ feeding back so to speak; that voice comes more as intuition I think.

    1. I am a person who uses intuition to guide myself. I believe that the more connected I become and less I create fear the more my intuition serves me.

      I spend everyday with people pretty much from when I wake up until I sleep. Lately I have been walking more and getting more alone time.

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